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The Sh!t no one tells you : a guide to surviving your baby's first year / Dawn Dais.

Shit no one tells you (parallel title)
Dais, Dawn. (Author).

Summary:

There comes a time in every new mother’s life when she finds herself staring at her screaming, smelly “bundle of joy” and wishing someone had told her that her house would reek of vomit, or that she shouldn’t buy the cute onesies with a thousand impossible buttons, or that she might cry more than the baby. Best-selling humor author Dawn Dais, mother to a one-year-old and author of The Nonrunner's Marathon Guide for Women, is convinced that there is a reason for this lack of preparedness. She believes that a vast conspiracy exists to hide the horrific truth about parenting from doe-eyed expectant mothers who might otherwise abandon their babies in hospitals and run for it. In The Sh!t No One Tells You, Dais tells it like it is, revealing what it’s really like to be a new parent and providing helpful insights, humor, and hope for those who feel overwhelmed by the exhausting trials they’re suddenly facing. Eschewing the adorableness that oozes out of other parenting books, Dais offers real advice from real moms—along with hilarious anecdotes, clever tips, and the genuine encouragement every mom needs in order to survive the first year of parenthood.

Record details

  • ISBN: 9781580054843
  • ISBN: 1580054846
  • Physical Description: 247 pages : illustrations ; 21 cm
  • Publisher: Berkeley : Seal Press, [2013]

Content descriptions

Formatted Contents Note:
1 And You Thought Pregnancy Was Hard 13 -- 2 Please Censor Your Birth Story 17 -- 3 Raid the Hospital 31 -- 4 Breastfeeding Is Really F'n Hard 37 -- 5 They Will Let You Take a Baby Home! 49 -- 6 So Many Tears 55 -- 7 Your Newborn Is Not Cute 63 -- 8 It May Not Be Love at First Sight 69 -- 9 No One Is Loving This as Much as Their Facebook Posts Would Have You Believe 79 -- 10 You Just Pooped Out a Baby (Your Body Post-Baby) 85 -- 11 Your Life Is Officially Over 93 -- 12 Poop, Puke, and Pee 103 -- 13 Children's Books Are Ridiculous 111 -- 14 You Are a Horrible Mother Whether or Not You Vaccinate 125 -- 15 Having Pets Did Not Prepare You for This 133 -- 16 Who Needs a Health Plan When You Have the Internet? 143 -- 17 You'll Never Sleep Again 149 -- 18 Your House Is Way Too Small 159 -- 19 Babies Don't Like Bragging 169 -- 20 You Can't Afford This 173 -- 21 Teeth Are the Devil 181 -- 22 You'll Be Blamed in Therapy Someday 189 -- 23 You Can't Have It All 195 -- 24 A Dysfunctional Relationship 207 -- 25 Remember Your Memory? 213 -- 26 Your Body Is Ruined 219 -- 27 You'll Probably Want a Divorce 225 -- 28 It Does Not Go By "Soooo Fast" 235.
Subject: Motherhood > Humor.
Infants > Humor.
Child rearing > Humor.
Motherhood.
Genre: Humor.

Available copies

  • 4 of 4 copies available at NC Cardinal.
  • 1 of 1 copy available at Johnston County Affiliated Libraries. (Show)

Holds

  • 0 current holds with 4 total copies.
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Show Only Available Copies
Location Call Number / Copy Notes Barcode Shelving Location Status Due Date
Public Library of Johnston County and Smithfield 808.87 Dai (Text) 38950610718621 Adult Nonfiction Available -
Albert Carlton - Cashiers Community Library 808.87 D (Text) 39493107403166 Adult Nonfiction Available -
Haywood County Main Library 808.87 Dais (Text) 33115007381244 Adult Nonfiction Available -
Pack Memorial Library 808.87 DAI (Text) 0020510072950 Adult Nonfiction Available -

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520 . ‡aThere comes a time in every new mother’s life when she finds herself staring at her screaming, smelly “bundle of joy” and wishing someone had told her that her house would reek of vomit, or that she shouldn’t buy the cute onesies with a thousand impossible buttons, or that she might cry more than the baby. Best-selling humor author Dawn Dais, mother to a one-year-old and author of The Nonrunner's Marathon Guide for Women, is convinced that there is a reason for this lack of preparedness. She believes that a vast conspiracy exists to hide the horrific truth about parenting from doe-eyed expectant mothers who might otherwise abandon their babies in hospitals and run for it. In The Sh!t No One Tells You, Dais tells it like it is, revealing what it’s really like to be a new parent and providing helpful insights, humor, and hope for those who feel overwhelmed by the exhausting trials they’re suddenly facing. Eschewing the adorableness that oozes out of other parenting books, Dais offers real advice from real moms—along with hilarious anecdotes, clever tips, and the genuine encouragement every mom needs in order to survive the first year of parenthood.
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